“It’s not your income. It’s who you’re being with money.“
I want to talk today about our financial identity. If you have ever thought:
“Why does my money always end up here?”
“Why does it improve… then collapse?”
“Why do I work, try, learn — and still feel stuck at the same level?”
I want you to know something. You are not broken. You are not bad with money. And you are not lacking discipline. What you are experiencing has a name. It’s called financial identity.
And once you see it — truly see it — money suddenly makes sense.
This post is not about hustling harder. It’s not about budgeting better. It’s not about becoming someone else.
It’s about understanding who you already are with money — and why money keeps responding to you in the same way.
🌹 Segment 1: What Is Financial Identity?
Your financial identity is not your income. It is not your job title. It is not your bank balance on a good day.
Your financial identity is:
• What feels normal for you financially
• What your nervous system expects
• What you unconsciously return to
• What feels safe — even if it’s uncomfortable
This is why two women can earn the same amount… and live in completely different realities.
One feels relaxed. One feels anxious.
One grows. One stagnates.
Money does not respond to effort alone. Money responds to identity.
If this lands, pause reading this post. Because this truth changes everything.
🧠 Segment 2: How Financial Identity Is Formed
Here’s something that will set you free: You did not choose your financial identity. You absorbed it.
It formed through:
• What you witnessed growing up
• What money represented in your household
• Who had power — and who didn’t
• What caused stress, tension, shame, or silence
• What happened the first times you earned, lost, or owed money
Your nervous system learned money before your mind did.
So, when today you:
• Feel tension opening your bank app
• Downplay small amounts
• Avoid asking for money owed
• Feel guilt for wanting more
• Self-sabotage after progress
You’re not failing. You’re returning to the familiar. And here it is — the sentence that changes everything:
We don’t sabotage success. We return to what feels familiar.
🔁 Segment 3: Why Money Keeps Repeating Itself
This is where most women have their “oh my God” moment. Your financial identity acts like an invisible thermostat. When money rises above what feels normal — your system quietly brings it back down. Not because you’re irresponsible. But because unfamiliar wealth feels unsafe.
So, you might:
• Overspend
• Lend and not reclaim
• Avoid tracking
• Create emergencies
• Delay decisions
• Lose focus
Your identity whispers: “This is too much. Go back.”
And until identity changes — circumstances can’t stick.
This is why:
• Raises don’t last
• Windfalls disappear
• New income doesn’t stabilize
• Motivation fades
Money is not the problem. Identity is the driver.
✨ Segment 4: The Shift That Changes Everything
Here’s the empowering part. You do not change identity by force. You change it through repetition with safety. Identity is not what you say. It’s what you practice.
It is:
• What your habits reinforce
• What your nervous system expects
• What your thoughts rehearse
• What your boundaries protect
Every day, you are rehearsing an identity:
• When you open or avoid your bank app
• When you reclaim or abandon small amounts
• When you speak up — or stay silent
• When you choose clarity over comfort
I changed my financial identity the same way anyone can — through awareness first.
I noticed every moment I abandoned my money. Every time I stayed quiet. Every time I choose discomfort over dignity. And from each moment, I created a money identity rule to live by.
I wrote down those money identity rules. On paper. On my phone. And I read them daily. Not to shame myself — but to retrain my system.
Every rehearsal counts.
🌿Segment 5: How to Begin Reprogramming Your Financial Identity
Start here — softly and honestly:
1️⃣ Observe your defaults
Where do you tense? Where do you avoid? Where do you over-give?
2️⃣ Name your current identity
Not who you want to be — who you are right now with money.
3️⃣ Create one stabilizing ritual
Tracking. Checking balances. Sitting with numbers without judgment.
4️⃣ Practice micro-integrity
Reclaim change. Ask once. Pause before giving. Honor small amounts.
5️⃣ Expand your “normal” gently
No pressure. Just presence. This is not about becoming aggressive. It’s about becoming grounded. Money respects grounded women.
🌙 Closing Transmission
Let me leave you with this truth: Your money will not change because you want it to.
It will change when who you are with money changes.
And the moment you see this — you are no longer powerless.
You are no longer confused. You are no longer fighting yourself.
You are becoming conscious. And consciousness is wealth.
Thank you for being here. Thank you for choosing awareness. And remember — this isn’t about becoming someone else. It’s about coming home to yourself.
✍🏽 Journaling Prompts
• What feels financially “normal” for me — even if I don’t like it?
• When money increases, what behaviors follow?
• What did money represent in my childhood?
• Where do I feel tension or guilt with money today?
• Who am I being with money — and who am I ready to rehearse becoming?
Salima
Just me thinking out loud over here